Oh well

I've been saying that a lot lately. That, and Meh, along with a fatalitistic shrug of the shoulders.

The guy from the last entry did not, in fact, work out. We'd have been great in bed, but jealousy and possessiveness would have quickly intruded.
So close to exactly what I want, yet so far.

That keeps on happening. I met a guy last night, while I was out with Joe for Valentines at Twisted. Hot guy, pretty lips, very, very aggressive. Pulled me aside as I came out of the ladies room, complimented my glasses, ascertained my state of takeness, and proceeded to quickly and cleanly get down to the brass tacks of wanting to fuck the shit out of me. And I was tempted. But I was there with J. Who would have been not only fine with, but completely thrilled by the knowledge of me being fucked by another man. He'd have wanted to watch, but I'm absolutely positive we could have worked something out.
But I was uncomfortable, and told him I was going to stay with the person I was with. We exchanged numbers, and I went back to J. Who I didn't fuck that night because I was feeling awkward and uncomfortable.
Went home that night to a lovely couple of Valentines presents from Trevor. Including getting woken up at 2am and brought to a slowly building crescendo of screaming, squirming orgasm, then fucked over the edge into oblivion. My cell phone peeped in the middle of it, at 3am, and it was the guy from that night, sending me a picture of his prodigious cock. I laughed when I finally saw it, and promptly fell asleep. But the image of that cock, and his hands pulling my tits out of the tight little tank top they were in last night and measuring them in the dark little corner he'd dragged me to, stayed with me. So I answered his text this morning. And we engaged in some light flirting. And he asked me for a pic. So I sent him a face pic. And he asked to see my breasts again. And I said maybe in person, but I don't send pics to people I don't know well, which is ironic because I will totally fuck you. And he persisted in asking for the boob pic. So, I have stopped talking to him. Moron.

And now, tonight. Was out and about with Dawn, having so much fun. Had logged into OkCupid to create her profile, and ended up engaging in some quick, witty repartee with a handsome man, who promptly asked me out tonight.
So, now I'm sitting in this bar, drinking a smokey martini and writing a ridiculously rambling blog post. I WAS waiting for this sexy, aggressive man to show up, but he just texted and said his bus was half an hour late and maybe we should reschedule for tomorrow. Man. I just really wanted to get fucked tonight. I'm in a bar full of men, and the ones whose dicks I'd love to suck right now are completely intimidated by me. They keep stealing glances and exchanging quick smiles, but not approaching. Maybe because of the older, obnoxious but still evolutionary viable silverbacks who have surrounded me.
Looking like a high class, chubby little call girl has its disadvantages in moments like this.

So much ugh. And Meh.